Quick Impressions       Our Blog      Subscribe

January 2007
Always the Banker? Breaking Out of Burdensome Roles

Written by Gwen

It happens in a game of Monopoly with my family.

It reoccurs with friends in our monthly Texas Hold ‘Em Poker Night.

It’s spread to household finances, my company and the family pool business.

I’m the banker. The financial soothsayer. The one with the ability to process, draw blood out of a stone and get results.

So, what if I told you this is one of my least liked responsibilities? Yet, I pull it off so well that the words, “Pick me to do anything financial” seem to be emblazoned on my forehead.

Money matters fall to me often out of necessity. It took five years to straighten out the credit mess that my husband brought to our marriage. (I’m not joking when I describe a shoebox filled with unopened, unpaid bills). Turning over the business books to a bookkeeper backfired and ended with the IRS chasing us down. And, the monthly poker game would take another hour to start if I didn’t just jump in and get things rolling.

Like an actor typecast as the geeky teen for too long, I’m torn between ditching the bean counter job and holding on to that role for fear of losing an important part of who I am. It’s good to be recognized for a natural talent and know I’ll always have a position. It’s even better when you feel like others rely on you for something important. Yet, I have more to offer and what fuels my interest definitely doesn’t involve hours of Quickbook data.

So, how do I break free? Knowing in some cases I may not be able to get rid of all of my duties, there must be something I can do to lighten the banking load. Here’s where my brainstorming took me:

On the business front…

Let go. Long ago my brain told me to hand-it-over to a professional and free myself up be strategic.

My challenge is that while I can do a passable job on the details, limited resources and time are forcing me to trust someone else to take the day-to-day function and place myself an oversight role. A great resource I found recently for freelance help on everything from web development to bookkeeping, is an online service called Elance. (Check them out at www.Elance.com).

I’ve now outsourced both payroll and taxes.

On the poker front…

This one is all about leadership lessons. While I could eternally play the “banker” for poker night, that would be an unwise move. Not only does it keep me pinned down, but what happens when I can’t make the game? I could throw the formal words succession planning around, but the bottom line is making sure others can function without me and are building their own skill base. Sure, you have to drop the ego (the world can and should continue to rotate without me), but equipping others is one way of releasing the role that holds you down.

For those on boards or in management, turning over the reigns encourages growth. One clear example that comes to mind is the association board executive who grew tired of always managing event details. With some nudging, she now has a support team of “implementers” who handle the particulars.

Watch out my poker friends, I’ll definitely be passing on the calculator, chip count sheet, money envelope and duties at our next round!

On the personal front…

There really isn’t much that I can do here. To throw my hands up and heave the bills in the air would only leave a bigger mess in the end. When you find that a role is yours because it must be yours (regardless of whether you want it or not), you need find a way to make it through. Whether its supporting an ailing parent or a function at work, strategies to energize yourself are critical.

One person I know, dealing with a tough work situation, set up a monthly after hours night out with a friend. Another friend with a clingy, sick parent established a once a week, outing for her mom with the intention of pacifying the constant demand for attention while keeping her own personal life intact. My way of getting through the finances vary but have a common theme. Sometimes I drink a glass of wine; on other occasions I do Pilates to unravel the knots.

We have options about the roles that are placed on us. If you are bogged down by the “banker”, “therapist”, “tech support”, “loving child”, “super mom” or other roles, it’s time to brainstorm your own strategies. After all, where would Harrison Ford be as an actor if we all still saw him only as the sexy rogue “Hans Solo”?